I’ve seen my share of bad movies. But then there are those movies that are beyond foul. That is distinctly terrible in a way that you’ll never forget. Artemis Fowl is one of those movies.
This movie made me appreciate the likes of Harry Potter in a way I never quite appreciated before. Artemis Fowl, a young lad on the shores of Ireland, must save his father from a dark villain who wants some mysterious object called the Aculos. A mysterious object that is not once explained, leading you to question why everyone wants it in the first place.
The movie, under a menial runtime of one hour and thirty-five minutes, feels like it never explains anything. The characters are lame, the story is atrociously crafted, and by the conclusion, which is very obviously trying to set up a sequel, you are literally sick with confusion and misery.
Disney+ is a great streaming service that I’m proud to be a member of but let me tell you, this movie is garbage. Absolute garbage…and now I understand why it was brought to Disney+. Beware of the straight-to-Disney-plus films (like Onward.) It’s a good chance that the movie is going to be pretty awful.
Artemis Fowl is the first movie I have ever personally scored on IMDb with 1 star. That’s the score, folks. 1 star!
(Do yourself a favor and don’t watch this movie.)
I thank you for reading and I hope you have a great day.